As if just being injured isn’t ugly enough, I thought I’d give just a little insight into my state of mind over the past few weeks. I try not to be too negative, but I feel like it’s important to be honest with how this has been affecting me.
I’m struggling both mentally and physically. Some days are better than others, but few are truly “good” right now. Exercise and the endorphins it produces are one of the main ways I combat the stress of my job and just life in general. Take those away completely and it’s been really hard to keep my emotions in check. I’m irritable, short-fused and often feel like I want to punch the walls. It’s also hard to watch Batch and other friends continue to run like rock stars and smash their PRs at every distance. I’m excited for them, but then I get sad because I’m not out there too (yes, I’m selfish) and I’m worried that they won’t want to run with me whenever I can finally run again because I’ll be so slow.
On the physical side, I’m lethargic and frankly, my clothes are tight. Yes, already. When you go from working out 5-6 days a week, running 40+ miles and cycling 40+ miles each week to absolutely nothing it’s a HUGE shock to your body. On top of the visible physical issues, the lack of exercise and endorphins seem to have negated all the progress we made over the last 10 months or so with regulating my hormones.
So what am I doing about it?
I’ve been walking each evening with Batch (I’m allowed to “stroll” aka not power walk) and doing some modified core work. I was able to meet Laura on Saturday morning for a walk. It was nice to walk with someone who’s been on the DL recently too and completely understands.
We did a cleanse that we’ve been wanting to do for a while. We modified a few plans we’d been looking at and basically ate only fruits and veggies (with some rice protein mixed in to a smoothie in the mornings). It was surprisingly good. I enjoyed knowing I was getting enough fresh fruits and veggies, but I was often hungry. We’re going to continue some of the things we did on the cleanse, but add back some protein this week.
I should be able to add machine weights to my routine beginning this week (I’ve been 2 weeks solid with no flare ups). I have a follow up appointment on Tuesday and hope to discuss some allowable cardio while my body continues to heal.
Thanks for sticking around and for reading my rants.